Saturday, July 15, 2006

Saint Mel, the Insane







**My books are at http://www.lulu.com/abeautifulcow**

By all accounts, Mel Gibson lived the Hollywood lifestyle when he was in his prime - booze, drugs, and lots of women. I'm pretty sure that he was married, too, and in the process of having the many kids that a Catholic is expected to have. Then he cleaned up his act, became a good Catholic and now can tell us all how we should live our lives.

Thank you, Mel. I would like to know how to use drugs, drink and cheat on my wife (when I get one). Your experience will prove very valuable to me.

But I was thinking ... it looks like his years of bad living left him with a tast for the kinky stuff. Like especially the S and M. I'm thinking of two movies that he had a hand in here, Brave Heart and The Passion of the Christ.

First BraveHeart. Braveheart was the story of Scottish Patriot William Wallace who opposed the British many years ago and led troops into battle against them, and ... I don't know. Apparently the movie wasn't very historical so I couldn't tell you what actually happened as opposed to what St. Mel says happened. As I understand it, the dying British Monarch did not actually throw his son's Gay lover off of a tower and William Wallace didn't impregnate the wife of the gay prince. Whatever.

At the end of Braveheart William Wallace is being slowly tortured and executed by an evil inquisitor who wants him to say that the British King is wonderful, which will earn William Wallace a quick death as opposed to the long drawn out one we are shown. This is BS because they weren't going to shorten the program one bit no matter what you said. Treason against the crown was the same thing as treason against God, because the Monarch ruled by divine right. The execution started with a half hanging, then they disemboweled you, then they burned your bowels, then they drew and quartered you.

Mel's right then when he showed Wallace being half hanged and and disemboweled, however ... William Wallace never shouted out: 'Freedom!' which caused the angry and frustrated evil inquisitor to chop off his head. Didn't happen. And what on Earth would William Wallace have meant by that even if he had yelled that out? Scottland wasn't going to go to a system of representative democracy with a bill of rights and all that. At best they would just exchange one monarch for another who lived closer to home, but most every person would still live a course, brutish oppressed life.

The Passion of the Christ, you might say, was historical especially with the depiction of the Roman method of execution. And if you accept that the gospels are historical (many dispute this) then it was absolutely historical, even to the language that might actually have come out of the mouths of the people involved. There wasn't a creepy figure representing Satan mentioned following Jesus around, but maybe none of the disciples got around to writing about that.

The truly disturbing part about both of these movies is the almost gloating way they document the torture and suffering of the protaganists. I was definitely left with the feeling that Mel was just getting off on showing all of this blood and gore. I remember in Passion of the Christ where the Roman whipper was selecting which instrument of torture he would use on Jesus and he held up this big club that had sharp spikes coming out of it and leered over it almost. Then he selected the flagellum (the whip with flesh ripping spurs) and he tested it on a table causing it to splinter - just to let us all know what it could really do. Of course, he's just laughing sadistically as he does his job, but I have to wonder about that. I mean, whipping people is his job. Even if you enjoy your job a whole bunch you don't laugh sadistically all day long as you do it, do you? Why would this guy?

Mel made a lot of money out of that last movie, and supposedly he has more Biblical epics lined up to film. But do we really need to see them? There really aren't stories that are so interesting or dramatic as that one, are there? But maybe he'll make a sequel to Passion of the Christ. Jesus did rise from the dead, after all, so the story hasn't been entirely told. Though, I'm wondering how Mel will gore that one up. Well, I'm sure he'll find a way.


Sunday, July 09, 2006

Pay Attention to that Man Behind the Curtain







**My books are at http://www.lulu.com/abeautifulcow**

The Republican administration would like you to believe that the most pressing issues that are facing this country are illegal immigration, gay marriage, and flag burning. They're like bad magicians trying to mis-direct you from the hand that actually has the coin. Excuse me, when you fueled up at the pump and paid a dollar more for a gallon of gas then you did last year were you really thinking about how incensed you were that people of the same sex could wear gold rings in on their left hand in ... let's see, exactly one state?

Or perhaps did you think that your wages in your non-border state were being depressed because of competition from illegal immigrants? Don't tell me that not raising the minimum wage holds down wages because even though it does - that hurts business! And flag burning must have a constitutional amendment to stop it! Cross burning is still okay because that's free speech but flag burning must be stopped because that's ... well, free speech but unpatriotic free speech and brother, we have a patriot act so that by law you have to be a patriot (as defined by the current administration).

The hell of it is, the entire media is pointing out how the administration and the Republicans are trying to change the subject from the ones that they don't want you to think about. Like Iraq. Like gasoline prices. Like the growth of poverty. Like the grotesque budget deficit. Like global warming. Like the healtcare crisis. Like ... oh, there are so many more things that we should talk about before we go back to thosed tired 'energizing the conservative base' issues.

Don't they see how they're being used? Hear this conservative base: If the Republicans actually cared about these things they would have done them, already. They control congress, they control the senate, they pretty much control the courts. The president has vetoed absolutely nothing that has crossed his desk. It's been six years that they've been in charge; they only pretend to care when it's election time, but they don't. They want you to watch their shiny, phoney social issues.

In the movie The Wizard of Oz, the final scene has Dorothy (and Toto, too), the Scarecrow, and the Tin Woodman in the Wizard's great hall. The Wizard is represented by a big giant head super-impsed on great clouds of smoke and lightening. As the Wizard is bellowing at them, Toto runs away and pulls away the curtain from a small alcove to reveal a little man furiously pulling levers while speaking into a huge tube. The little man looks startled, pulls the curtain back in position and the Wizard say: "Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain!" Which, of course, they very wisely don't.

That's advice we should all ignore. Please, do pay attention to that man behind the curtain. Pay attention to what they don't want you to look at. Those are the secrets that need to be reveale and that's what we need to be talking about.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

More Re-Spamming: It's really Fun!



This is my re-spamming message below.



'Thanks!

My books are at http://www.lulu.com/abeautifulcow

Steve'





Re-Spamming is possibly not my invention but it's a really fun activity and I highly recommend it. If you have something to sell - and who of us doesn't? Then simply reply to your spamm e-mails with your own advertisement for whatever you've got that you want to unload. Here's the thing: There are real people somewhere out there on the other end of that spam and at some point a 'real' person will have to look at it. They buy things, too, don't they? Maybe they want to buy your stuff.

And you're not imposing on them at all because they e-mailed you in the first place and they wanted to hear from you! So, you're not being (possibly) intrusive like they were.

Okay, I don't believe any of them actually have bought one of my books, although they should because every one of them is entertaining - but, start your Steve Sommers library with one of the Lulu books first.

So far, I've gotten three responses to my re-spamming. The first was from a man who said he would tell his friends with children ... I count that as a positive. The second was actually a response to the blog about the respamming. It was from a guy for payday loans who seemed a bit hurt that I was doing this, being critical of the way he was doing business. The third was just
a response to the connection where I could opt out of their spamm.

I re-re-spammed! Oh, that was so sweet. After all, instead of just giving me the option of opting out, why didn't they not send it to me in the first place? Problem solved, wouldn't you say?

Oh well. I can't really say why advertisements via e-mail seem so much more intrusive then other kinds of advertisements. We watch TV and that's alright, or the radio. Every day stuff comes in the mail and just as fast it goes into the garbage and that's alright, too. E-mail (and telephones, too) are more private, I think. You want to use both for your own business and didn't purposely expose yourself to these ads.

They must work, I'm guessing. If they didn't my yahoo bulk mail wouldn't be filled with their stuff. Like most people, I have a few mail boxes; the first one that I seldom ever use now has 20,577 e-mails (I just checked). Yahoo empties it every thirty days so there are a hell of a lot of people spending a hell of a lot of money and getting nothing back at all.

I only ever bought once. It was for business cards and I wanted some business cards and they were cheap. So, there you go. They got some of their money back for their trouble. But the rest of them? Nope.

Speaking of which, since I do have so many spamm e-mails that need re-spamming, I better get to work. Just in that one mail box I have over twenty thousand people I can annoy. One of them must like science fiction.