Thursday, March 30, 2006

What a Half a Trillion Dollars can Buy: Part III of an infinite series

Logically my series can have infinite parts, but today I'll stay at one:

Lap dances! - lots and lots of lap dances. A half a trillion dollars that was spent on Iraq could have better been spent on adult entertainment at strip clubs. Let me get out my calculator here ... five hundred million divided by an average of twenty dollars per dance ... that would be ... twenty five million! Wow, that's sure a hell of a lot of happiness. Of course, when I think about it this would mean that lap dances would become a government program and so, of course, it would be run with the usual government inefficiency.

Crap. We'd all have to fill out multiple forms and put with excessive delays just so we could have one naked woman crawling around on us. Hey wait, I think I might be willing to put up with that. Okay, sure. I can live with the government running the free lap dance program because it's sure a lot better than no free lap dance program. Right?

And unlike the war in Iraq nobody would be losing limbs or dying prematurely, except possibly from too much fun! Nobodys going to be blown up or kidnaped or anything like that. So, let's do it. Let's bring our troops home right now and start spending all that war on the government lap dance program. I'll even be magnanamous about this and say that our returning troops can be first in line.

They deserve it, don't you think?

**And please feel free to check out my new novel, Rexroi, on-line. Just click on the sidebar to the right **

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